The #FatChick Discovers Another Cousin of The Seven Witches of Menopause—Insomnia #aging #MyWANA

It's Tuesday once again and time for some sharing from this forty something year old fat chick. In case you haven't figured it out yet, I'm "The Fat Chick" and this is my chance to share with you the craziness that is my life now that I'm in my late forties.

I'm not one of those broads who's constantly worried about getting older. In fact, I WELCOME it. I don't always enjoy what I have to go through during this stage of my life, but all of it is a part of me and my life journey. Of course it's all fodder for my books and my blogs. LOL!

Well, fodder isn't quite the right word here...fair game is more like it. ;) I mean that. I don't have a lot of secrets in my life anymore. I've exposed most of them through my characters in the books I write as myself or my alter egos Lia Michaels, Stephanie Ryan, and Tawny Savage. The raw emotions and their life challenges have all been what I've lived through. Through them, I've worked through my various issues, one at a time. It's the best form of therapy for me. 

However, there's one thing plaguing me as of late. I didn't think I'd have to deal with this since I've been battling Sleepy Witch of Menopause off and on for some time. Unfortunately, she's taken a backseat to her older cousin, Insomnia. 

It's become so bad lately, I'm finding myself losing track of what I'm doing during the day. Without enough full, deep sleep, I just appear to go through the motions. I can't think, my words jumble, and I can't follow conversations going on around me. This is no good when you're trying to pull information out of a tight-lipped pet owner about what's going on with their animal.

Normally my mind is going around four or five sentences faster than my mouth, but not when Insomnia comes calling. That witch turns my brain to mush and I can't remember what happened five minutes ago let alone five days ago. This is the most frustrating feeling for me. I used to pride myself on being able to multitask and zip through my day. Now I'm lucky to make it through my shift at the veterinary hospital and get through everything on my to do list.

I'm not sure why this is happening to me. I've been working on my diet and weight loss program. My blood sugar is fairly well regulated. I drink my water throughout the day and only have caffeine once or twice a week and that's early in the day. So why am I being plagued with sleepless days and nights? 

Insomnia is even interfering with my nap time folks! Something has to be done and fast! LOL

Seriously, the more I look at my life, the more I realize I'm under a tremendous amount of pressure and stress. My husband is retiring from the Coast Guard at the end of the summer and we're moving to another state. A new life, new job, new everything is in front of me and I'm scared shitless. 

I've moved and changed jobs before, but at this point in my life, I'm worried that I can't cut it. I'm not digging being a veterinarian anymore but it's all I've done for the last twenty-one years. It's what I've worked for my entire life from the age of nine up until now. I've reached the point where I've accomplished all I'm going to in this profession. I want more from life than being an old woman shuffling to work every day to poke and prod my patients. 

It's time I moved out of the way and let the young whipper snappers waiting in the wings take over. They've watched me and learned what they need to in order to make the job their own. It's time I let them do it. That's the part that scares me. What if I didn't teach them enough for them to survive? What if I let them down and they fail?

All of these thoughts and questions run through my brain each and every night along with my publishing deadlines, finding new ways to promote my books, make new connections and friends and help them promote their work...

It never ends. I have to find another way to divert my mind and body from obsessing over all of this. Life will go forward no matter what I do or freak out over. It's time I accept that, and roll with the punches. Until I do, I'll just keep awake for as long as I can, just like the kids in those Freddy Krueger movies. The song in the video below always reminds me of those movies and it's pretty spot on for how I'm feeling right now. 

Enjoy!
Until next time,
~The Fat Chick

The #FatChick Smashes A Common Myth About Women Over Forty #aging #libido #MyWANA

Welcome to the Memoirs of this Forty Something Fat Chick here at Not Enough Time in the Day. This week I'd like to address the commonly held notion that once a broad hits the big FOUR OH, her sex drive runs for the hills, never to be seen again.

If you believe that bad boy, you're just asking for a smack in the face ala Cher in Moonstruck.

Personally, I think this particular myth was started by a group of men that wanted to keep control of their wives, girlfriends and daughters. They didn't want them to find out what really happens to their body when they reach the start of their fifth decade of life. (Yes, when you hit forty, you start the fifth decade if you count the years birth to 10 as decade #1, 11-20 as decade #2...get the picture?) ;)

Why did they want to keep this info from the women in their lives? Simple. They were used to being the alpha males, the one to control if, when and how often they did the deed with their women. There's no way they'd allow their bodies to be used as instruments of pleasure. No no no. It wouldn't do to allow the weaker sex to control what happened in the bedroom. They may end up unlocking their inner freak and we wouldn't want that now would we? hehehehe

I joke about this because I've met women who've actually bought into this crap. They've convinced themselves their once active libido has left the building. Oh don't get me wrong. These females are becoming less interested in the same old sex they've had with their partner for years. They want to feel the curl your toes, full body shuddering, screaming every obscenity in the book pleasure that comes with diving into the sexual unknown.

Why do you think the Fifty Shades books were so popular with "Mommies"? The little bit of taboo in those pages gave them permission to explore their own naughty fantasies and not feel like they're too old to do it. Trying out a little light bondage with silk scarves and ties was enough to restart their engines and show them they could take over in the bedroom if they really wanted to do it. 

Personally, I've never understood it when friends told me they were too tired to have sex or they could do without it all together. Once they turned forty, they found they had a widely accepted excuse at their disposal. They could blame it on their age and their partner would have to accept it.

Right?

WRONG! 

At forty-seven, my hormones may be out of whack, but they sure as heck didn't damper my interest in sex. In fact, I found the opposite is true. I want sex all the time. I've become equal to those twenty-somethings that hump like bunnies 24/7. Not that I get to do that, mind you but if given half a chance I just might! LOL!

So is my reaction the exception to the rule? NOPE. It's perfectly normal and it's time we take back our sexuality and just enjoy it. Why do you think there are so many cougar tales out there? More and more older women are tossing aside the old vanilla routines and going for the younger dudes who can keep up with their need to explore their down and dirty side.

It's time to stop hiding behind the menopause excuse and get your freak on! Tell your partner exactly what you want to explore with them and DO IT!

Until next time my hotties!

~The Fat Chick

The #FatChick Makes Plans for the New Year Filled with Changes and New Adventure #amwriting #MyWANA #ampublishing

Happy New Year and welcome to Not Enough Time in the Day. I'm the "Fat Chick" here to once again share a bit of life after the age of forty. If it's your first time here...welcome and thank you for stopping in. If you've been here before, please forgive me while I fill in the others for a few minutes...and thank you for coming back! ♥♥♥

I discovered many things in my life changed the INSTANT I turned forty. I'm not kidding. From my vision to my ability to take off the weight I gained over the holidays, from snapping back after illnesses—everything in my world changed. Not for the better either but I'm getting through all that and making it better for myself. What I share here on this blog is my journey through it all. Whether it's good, bad, or downright miserable, I'll share it as it happens.

Like many people, I thought about making resolutions for the coming year, but with a huge list of events already ahead of me, I thought it was best just to step back and take note of how far I've come so far.

In September I was diagnosed with diabetes and high blood pressure basically due to my obesity. It's all documented in previous posts. So far I've lost just under thirty pounds and have my blood pressure almost perfect thanks to diet, exercise and a mild diuretic. My goal for this part is to be off the diuretic by September 2014. One year on my new plan is enough time and so far, so good!

I hope to be thirty pounds lighter by June when the hubby and I fly to Denver for the RomCon University and RomCon readers convention. Sixty pounds in a year is a manageable goal and I'll definitely feel a lot better breathing in those altitudes! This last year it was rough for me and was another wake up call to get healthy.

By September 2014, I hope to not have to worry about being diabetic. Yes that's a bit of a tougher goal to achieve, but if I can get the weight off, and continue with my diet and exercise plan, it is achievable. I'm leaving that on my list.

Time to buck up buttercup and accept the fact I need trifocals. Period. End of story. Even though my last driver's test showed I didn't need the vision restriction, it's the fine print that's killing me! There are some fabulously sexy frames out there now. I can rock the sexy librarian look better than anyone! Bring it!

I'm forty-seven years old. Time to accept the fact I won't have children of my own and more than likely won't adopt. It gets harder and harder for those in my age bracket to adopt kids. You wouldn't think it would be with all the kids who need homes with loving parents, but it is. This is the "curse" I bring to my younger hubby. If we by chance get to adopt, then it's our destiny to do so. I'll not force the issue and make myself feel less of a woman any longer.

Oh those Seven Witches/Bitches of Menopause will continue to plague me throughout my perimenopausal time right through the actual crazy hormonal upheaval. Whatever! I've had hot flashes since I was in my twenties. I've always been a bitch and the moodiness is a constant pain in my backside. They won't take over my year as I have my fabulous hubby by my side. He's seen me at my worst and he's still hanging around. Must be love. ♥♥♥

So in between having to run to the bathroom every 10 minutes, turning up the volume on the phone and televison, squinting to read fine print even with magnifying reading glasses, and sitting in front of an industrial sized fan to get through the hottest of flashes, I'll keep going. I get to go into semi-retirement this summer while hubby fully retires from the Coast Guard. We'll be moving to the beautiful Seattle area and starting a brand new life and career running our own publishing company. 

Life is as they say...GOOD for this old broad. Take care my friends. I'll see you all next week.

~The Fat Chick

The #FatChick Salutes the Cougar! #aging #MyWANA

Welcome back to this week's edition of Memoirs of a Forty Something Fat Chick. Today I'd like to give homage to the older woman/younger man relationship. That's right. I'm talking about the Cougar!

What exactly is a cougar? 

Basically it's a woman forty years of age or older who exclusively pursues very young men for either just sex or a full relationship. The age difference seems to have to be around ten years or more. Quite a few of these women are pursuing men who are young enough to be their sons.  LOL

As a fellow Cougar myself I can say it's da bomb! I agree there should a minimum of five years between you and your lover. My hubby is eight years younger than I am and treats me like a queen. My ex hubby was only five years younger than me and acting much younger...like a teenager who refused to grow up.

Peter Pan anyone?  Let's just say he's my ex for a reason.

Now the perks of having a young stud for a lover are pretty obvious. Both of you are in your sexual prime. Because they're eager to put a smile on your face, they'll bend over backwards to fulfill all your wildest fantasies. They know if you're happy, they'll want for nothing—both in and out of the bedroom.

Last week I talked about my infertility. Well, another perk of having a younger husband is he wants to have a family and will do everything in his power to make it happen. Whether it's trying fertility treatments, surrogates or good old fashioned adoption, the mate of the Cougar is game.

So all you over forty single women, get yourself a young bit of beefcake and have fun. Who knows? You're little romp in the hay may turn into a lifetime of happily ever after  just like mine.

Speaking of happily ever after...

My forty-seventh birthday is in a few short weeks. My hubby surprised me with reservations to stay at the Grand Californian at Disneyland.  I LOVE everything Disney and for him to save up for this trip to make my birthday extra special just goes to show you our match is really made in heaven. 

While looking for another video to poke fun at being a Cougar, I found this parody video. Hubby and I laughed so hard together and had to watch it a few more times. That's another thing that makes us click...he gets my wacky humor!

~Enjoy!